I never thought I'd feel like this, but lately it's really been on my heart. In fact, it's been a long time coming. I just can't shake it. I never thought I'd have to admit this, but I really miss being in school--a lot, a lot! Currently, many of my friends are wrapping up their undergrad studies or even working on their graduate degree. The more I hear about what they're learning, the more jealous I become! Somehow, I thought that'd always be me. I was that nerd who was never late to class and always sat in the first row. Embarrassing? Maybe a little. I stayed late; I worked hard. I loved experiencing just how empowering knowledge could be. The thing is, I'm just now realizing it.
A whole new ball game.
Well, I chose a somewhat unconventional route: photography. I've entertained the idea of pursuing a master's degree, but I'm quite certain it wouldn't fulfill this desire. So much of my education revolved around technical skills, production work, and marketing images. It wasn't exactly the kind of learning that required deep thought, intuition, and deep meditation. Don't get me wrong, everything I was taught was critical to my success in this intensely competitive industry. It was a top notch education for which I couldn't be more grateful. But I must admit, I still find myself lacking. Honestly, I feel as though I've barely scratched the surface of my craft...
Furthering my education.
Today, I promised myself I'd make a conscious effort to fill this nagging void. It came to me as I was recalling my last tutoring lesson of American Sign Language (yep, I finally made a commitment to learn it). My job as a photographer is to "create compelling images," bottom line. I've paid my dues and learned more than enough of the basics from the best of the best. However, a compelling image is so far above and beyond just "nailing the technical details." It's giving a voice to something or someone that would otherwise go unheard. In some cases, it's finding the good in the bad, and the beauty in the ugly. While in others, it's just telling the story for all that it's worth.
There are many matters in this life that burden my heart; they are ever-changing. So, that's where I'll start. I shall continue my educational ventures, pressing onward, pursuing the knowledge that those around me hold. It is my hope that this will create a distinguishing depth to my work, that would be otherwise untouchable.
It's almost like college. But it's my way, on my terms. How lucky I must be.
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